Women Against Abuse

I didn’t want them to see me being beat. I knew I had to get away and advocate for them to be strong, so they’d never allow anyone to ever put their hands on them.

But leaving was hard. I didn’t have nurturing family support at the time, because my mom was going through some tough things.

Sometimes people don’t understand that we stay for financial reasons or because we don’t have anywhere to go. And sometimes we’re trauma-bonded to the situation.

I planned my escape carefully and waited until he was away from home. My friends came over with a U-haul, and within hours we packed up all my stuff and I was gone. It was all about getting away and it was very scary.

I stood my ground because I knew I could not raise my daughters that way. My love for them overpowered everything. I chose myself, but I chose my children even more – to not have them in that environment. I left and never went back.

My ex and I learned to be cordial over time, and he eventually apologized for what he did. He was tragically killed during a robbery gone wrong, but he had made peace with me first.

I worked in the corporate world while I raised my daughters. But trauma and violence would strike again - I lost my daughter, Tianna, six years ago to gun violence. She was an innocent bystander, caught in the crossfire at a party.

Losing Tianna was so hard, but I’m surviving day by day. My daughter always said I was the strongest person in the world, so I keep getting up every day and making the world a better place. I do it for her.

Tianna saw how much I loved cooking and had always encouraged me to pursue my dream of becoming a chef. In 2019, I founded Stylish and Graceful Catering in loving memory of Tianna. I cook from a place of heart, healing and passion for flavor.

In addition to running Stylish and Graceful Catering, I work at a funeral home. I identify with the moms who are grieving. I have lived it and can really understand what they’re going through. I do it with a purpose and it helps me to keep going too.

As a survivor of domestic violence, I’m new to being an advocate, but I’m so proud to speak out and share my story to help others.